My shortened version,
"You create your own problems"
One of my well-worn (and most hated) life mantras.
My shortened version, "You create your own problems"
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Hello.
I'm a beginner And I wish somebody had told me that "Hey starting creative work? BE WARNED there is this..." gap? Seeks Identification. Misunderstood. Needs love. Wants to enjoy life. Driven to Suceed. Loves life. Hates life.
Funny how I've just described the average teenager's high school career, stereotypically speaking of course. But did you notice that this was all Frankenstein wanted too? If you haven't guessed it yet, my favorite color is orange. I'm not sure when this started because unlike most kids I never really had a favorite color. I went through various colors before I realized that this particular color really stands out to me. I can't understand it. I love this color and yet it seems so utterly flamboyant and loud. Sometimes this color is beautiful when I find it in random moments in life, like a sunset or orange M&Ms. Sometimes it distracting. Who wears a bright verging on neon matching sweatshirt/pants set out in public? Other times I ignore it completely and pick some other color over it. But consistently I've discovered that this color makes me feel happy. Its reliable. Other colors can only make me happy for a while or in that moment but whenever I see orange it automatically lifts my spirits no matter what I'm feeling.
Some crash-course color psychology, apparently if one prefers the color orange one is outgoing, warm, optimistic, impatient, easy-going with life problems and is a risk-taker. There are lots more. What I thought was hilarious was that there are certain attributes which suggest why one would hate the color orange. I found that I could relate to almost all of these, more so than those on my last list. If I hate hate orange with all my heart:
~ Tina "How can I help other people achieve their greatness? " Stewardship. It is synonymous with Leadership. A steward by definition is a person who serves others. That is a fundamental part of being a leader. A great leader isn't just one who bosses people around. A mark of a great leader is his or her ability to lead people. To lead others to realize their own awesomeness.
A few ways to say Family from around the world “The capacity for friendship is God's way of apologizing for our families.” ― Jay McInerney, The Last of the Savages I'm just poking fun at families. I actually do love my family for the record. It's big (8 strong) and fairly crazy (5 girls one boy) and rather weird (5 girls one boy) all the time. I'm crazy about them, every single beautiful atom of them I love dearly and with all my heart. But I still agree wholeheartedly with Jay McInerney. My family is perfect, and that includes the non-requisite-by-blood members too. I am lucky, I thank God that I am so lucky to have any family at all. I can't...function properly without them. They are my sanity and if ever I needed it, they alone could be my sole reason to exist and live. I would die for you guys, no hesitation, I know it in my heart and soul. My family is perfect, because they're all so flawed and imperfect. All the imperfections and flaws help keep life at least for myself, interesting, real. I know mine is no where near as close-knit as other families. It isn't very communication friendly, at least verbally. It isn't very whole all the time. That made me, very sad. We have collectively as a family the patience of a sugar high seven-yr-old. We've been through hard times, are going through difficult times and have overcome impossible circumstances. And I hope we realized along the way that it was together that we prevailed, together with sharing and love, understanding, being stupid, crying and hugging, together with love (that over-rated emotion) that we became and are a family. I will never stop loving you all. I can barely stand you all. It sucks. That quote up there is hilarious to me because it's true, families are a pain in the donkey. Yes, I would be an inmate at Mental Hospital if I could not know people outside of my immediate family whom I sleep, eat and live every single freaking day with. I'm very glad that our creator had the decency to equip us with the capacity for friends along with family within our hearts. I'm very (not really) upset with our creator's sense of humor. He who gave us smart-mouthed little brothers and crabby mother-in-laws, please, no encores. It's alright though guys, I think God more than made up for that with best friends, brothers-from-another-mothers, soul sistas, bros, homies, etc. Also isn't it ironic that within our lovely lovely families is where we often find our closest of friends. I hope you've realized by now that my audience is you guys, mi familia. I need to start talking to you guys, leaving things for you to remember good old me by. My thoughts, how I think and feel about the world and so on so forth. We don't really talk, deeply about things right? There is no profound communication. Banalities seem to suffice for day to day interaction but I know that you all have crazy deep reasoning and opinions about the world. If I never get the chance to talk about it with you all I want you to do it for yourselves okay? I've never fully shared my feelings about anything. Don't worry I don't plan on pouring out the dark recesses of my soul here, but I do want to let you see the world through my viewfinder. Morbid thoughts aside, I really do love you all. This is like the third time I've said it? ~ Tina " For you I'd bleed myself dry." "You know I love you so..."
Music. It is something which is like air, or the clothes you wear, or your nose. Easily forgotten. Tuned out by your brain. You don't realize how special it is until you need it. Or...bump it into a door. Today music is everywhere; it is accessible and listening is easy and almost instantaneous. Music is a soul food, it always has been even before the advent of the radios, internet or Ipods. Its been around since before recorded history in some style or form, form all over the world. If you ask people, "what's the oldest type of music you can think of?" I bet you'll get a whole lot of 'classical-Beethoven' type answers. You might get a few 'tribal music', maybe. But the thing is its been around for a while. I always wanted to know why? Why does music...exist? Sure it probably did start as the human voice experimenting with mimicking the various sounds of nature, but when did the primitive "...shuuushhhhhshussssh..." of water evolve into opera or folksy tunes? I don't know. That is a whole other crazy banana of its own, and I don't want to figure that out. But luckily some very cool people have... tried. Check out these links! http://www3.imperial.ac.uk/newsandeventspggrp/imperialcollege/newssummary/news_19-6-2012-9-59-1 http://www.darwin.cam.ac.uk/dcrr/dcrr002.pdf (that one is a bit of a read, about 200 pages. It's a research paper called the The Evolutionary Origins and Archaeology of Music) http://www.questia.com/library/music-and-performing-arts/music/history-of-music/history-of-music -More great links at that link above! So why am I blabbing on about music? I was reading Othello in class and this one scene coupled with an interesting idea from my teacher got me thinking about this whole music origins thing. Desdemona and Emilia her attendant are talking while Desdemona gets ready for bed. Desdemona is really emotional and so to sort of vent her anxieties, she breaks out in song. Othello isn't a musical. My teacher made a point of pointing that out to us. And I was like," oh yea, that's...noteworthy, that's cool that's cool. She sang to relieve her emotions, understandable." But then my teacher delved deeper into the significance of that scene. He said something along the lines of," wouldn't it be weird today if when you got emotional, you started to sing? Duh, imagine the weird looks you'd get. Of course it would, people just jam their ear buds in and turn on their smartphone. But they didn't have Ipods back then did they?"...etc. Of course my brain had a fart moment and went " Huh?...they didn't....?" Don't worry it was only a fleeting moment of stupidity, Iv'e recovered. Anyways, after that I had fun entertaining the question, "why music?" So far I can only give my answer. Music to me is a profound emotional experience, an art of expressing our souls and of course a language untouched by the everlasting effects of the Tower of Babel. I cannot live without it. ~ Tina
Is there a word for that envious yet empowered feeling you can get from an EPIC movie or book? You know, the kind of story that makes you want to live in that world. Come on, I wasn't he only one who was totally bummed OUT that I could not hop into my closet and pop out the other end in Narnia, right? And who else was mind blown by Inception? I am so amazed by these utterly unoriginal ideas, by the sheer variety of other peoples imaginative powers. Taking original ideas and making them into a new, unforgettable unoriginal ideas is then super awesome isn't it? A poorly envisioned and executed re-make is always a let down. But a well made re-mix is its own type of unoriginal creation. After all, everything we know is a remix of many things. New style trends are recycled, modified from there older versions but still are inherently the same. Similar story plots are written with different characters and settings. People are constantly re-imaging old movies making them into new ones. A couple of my all time favorite re-mixes of classic movies (classic to me) today are Man of Steel and Snow White and the Huntsman. My favorite princess growing up was Snow White. Repeated viewings on VCR can do that to a susceptible young toddler. I think it had to do with the black hair and singing. I was a sucker for a good song back then, still am today. The new movie sort of opened my eyes to the beauty of a timeless story. The more serious and less girly Snow White was a very interesting story twist. Actually the whole mood of the movie was much darker than the original story was which was a cool contrast. I loved it. Man of Steel relocated the story of Superman to the 21st century. Many elements stayed the same yet the new setting really made the adventure more relate able. I loved how this movie actually gave a more detailed 'history' of Superman's home planet and family. I love the older movies just as much as the newer ones. It's just that the re-mix was capable of giving me that same feeling of longing, which is something I appreciate and hate bitterly because it isn't real. I can only wonder and dream, which is fine by me. ~ Tina
mood music, give it a listen. seriously. |